waiting and waiting

I'm reposting this image from Lauree's blog. It's very true for our situation right now. We're waiting to hear back on our review of our homestudy. I didn't realize that it would take so long or else I would have submitted it a few weeks before our appointment.

Infertility has really taught me patience. Well, maybe that's not true, but now when I feel myself starting to get impatient I remind myself to be patient and to wait for God's plan to unfold. There's a reason why the brakes are on now.

It may mean we will not be transferring in November. We may have to wait until January. If that's the case I just need to cool my jets and count my blessings. Every time I interact with my son I forget about this frustration and just dive in to his smiles and happy grunts.

Two years ago we were waiting for domestic infant adoption and I was so depressed because there seemed to be no end in sight to the waiting. I was desperate for a baby and I couldn't convince anyone to choose us to adopt their baby. It was heartbreaking. The fear and anxiety of  thinking "what if the birthmother doesn't like us..."

Now, I only have to wait for a few weeks to be given the opportunity to connect with families who want to donate their embryos. It's a huge blessing. I pray that we are blessed with another healthy baby.

It would be a miracle.

There are miracles waiting for us, but we have to wait.

Cooling my jets over here and immensely grateful for embryo donation and adoption (even if it takes a while.)

Prayers to all of you on this journey.

xo Jill